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Sexting for Adults
Feeling frisky? Text your way to a hotter and more intimate relationship with these Do’s and Don’ts of sexting.


Courtesty of Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz
Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz


Sexting has gotten a bad rap in the media lately for being harmful to teenagers, but what about adults in consenting, long-term relationships like marriage? Sexting, or sending sexually suggestive texts or phone pictures, is a playful way to heat things up in a marriage. In fact, digital foreplay is not only a turn on; it can also improve intimacy.

To help you get more textually active, we asked textperts Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, authors of the new book, Flirtexting: How to Win Your Way to His Heart, to give you the Do’s and Don’ts of sexting your way to a hotter and more intimate relationship.

Do send him or her dirty texts when you’re feeling a little feisty; fun and playful texts when you’re thinking about your spouse throughout the day; and intimate flirtexts when you miss them.

Don’t argue or express deep emotions over text; it’s inconsiderate to your partner (e.g., "Are your cheating on me?," "I can’t stand your parents," "I want another baby").

Do use picture texts in a clever and creative way (e.g. snap a picture of your lips and write "they miss you").

Don’t be afraid to be racy. Being in a married relationship allows you the luxury to be more explorative and risqué with your flirtexts. You can use sexting to reveal fantasies and sexy thoughts to him/her while you’re at work or even across the dinner table.

Do use inside jokes or words that only the two of you are in on. For instance, say you were watching the movie Juno last night and started fooling around five minutes into it. If you’re feeling frisky today, text "Juno again tonight? I thoroughly enjoyed it last night." This ups the intimacy factor when you can't be physically close together at that moment.

Do’s and don’ts aside, sexting is a lighthearted way for two adults in love to stay connected and get a little frisky at the same time. Whether it’s saucy or sweet, sending a sexually charged text or picture messages can add a little spice to any marriage. So have fun, be creative and above all, always sext responsibly ;)


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Over 1 million couples turn to Hitched for expert marital advice every year. Sign up now for our newsletter & get exclusive weekly content that will entertain, educate and inspire your marriage.



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